"A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart" Luke 6:45 NLT.
"And now dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise." Philippians 4:8 NLT
So, there I was, surrounded by old friends that I had not seen in a while; a situation that usually makes me very happy and very anxious. Often times when I am placed in certain social situations, I become extremely self conscious about my weight, my appearance, the things I say, my actions... the list could go on for days. My insecurities tend to get the best of me and I end up not enjoying such events to the fullest. Not this time... this time I was genuinely happy, this time was different, this time I was fully present, fully engaged, and legitimately at ease throughout the ENTIRE evening. Then a conversation arose between me and a dear friend about weight loss. She said, "she lost 60 pounds, can you believe it? that's amazing! I need to do that". I responded, "yes, it is amazing and yes, I need to do that as well, I keep gaining and losing the same 40 pounds and I need to lose 100". This is where the conversation usually stops and I retreat into my own head full of self loathing and defeat BUT I continued... "but you know, the scale doesn't define me. The scale doesn't speak of my self worth, it simply tells me how much I weigh. My worth is found in God". Wait, what? Did I just say that? Yes, I did and you know what else? I believed it when I said it!
Recently, I could tell that my emotions and thoughts were headed down a wrong path. I was allowing my insecurities get the best of me and make me anxious, nervous, and even angry. I was caught in a cycle of defeat, failure, feeling as though I never measured up, that I wasn't beautiful, that I wasn't worthy of love, and that I would never be able to fulfill anything God wanted for me. So, I decided it was time to detox my mind and my heart. My plan of action was simple but rather difficult; I took a complete break from social media for a few weeks, I stepped back from certain relationships that were not healthy, and I began to listen to books and scripture during my hour long commute to and from work. On my lunch break I began to listen to the same worship songs over and over again, ones that spoke to my heart about the faithfulness of God and I started taking control over every thought that was destructive.
The truth is that I have been trying and failing to lose weight for some time now (like a decade). My 30th birthday is approaching and it's coming at me like a neon sign that says "HERE I AM AND YOU HAVE NOT ACCOMPLISHED ANYTHING... YOU ARE STILL FAILING". But when I spoke those words out loud I realized that I finally understood that my pants size doesn't define me anymore. The moment I spoke those words I wanted to drop to my knees in worship because I realized that God had truly done a work in my heart and my mind. Those pounds were still there but I was NO LONGER DEFINED BY THEM. All the TRUTH that I had been putting into my head and my heart had finally come out of my mouth and what is even better is I BELIEVED THOSE WORDS!
My weight does not define me.
My childhood does not define me.
My relationships do not define me.
My job does not define me.
What others think of me does not define me.
God defines me... after all, HE created and uniquely designed me, He should have the sole right to tell me what I am. Here are just a few things that He tells me:
I am a daughter of the most high God.
In Him I am a new creation.
He calls me friend.
I am a workmanship of His created to do good works
The peace of God guards my heart and my mind.
I am loved
I am clothed with the righteousness of Jesus
This list could go on and on but you get the picture. This list is not just for me, you have a list as well; it is found in the pages of scripture where He is waiting to meet with you and tell you who you are.
He is changing my heart. He is reminding me of my worth. He is helping me find peace and joy in my every day life. He is changing my heart which is changing my words, which is changing my life.
What is your heart speaking?
"And now dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise." Philippians 4:8 NLT
So, there I was, surrounded by old friends that I had not seen in a while; a situation that usually makes me very happy and very anxious. Often times when I am placed in certain social situations, I become extremely self conscious about my weight, my appearance, the things I say, my actions... the list could go on for days. My insecurities tend to get the best of me and I end up not enjoying such events to the fullest. Not this time... this time I was genuinely happy, this time was different, this time I was fully present, fully engaged, and legitimately at ease throughout the ENTIRE evening. Then a conversation arose between me and a dear friend about weight loss. She said, "she lost 60 pounds, can you believe it? that's amazing! I need to do that". I responded, "yes, it is amazing and yes, I need to do that as well, I keep gaining and losing the same 40 pounds and I need to lose 100". This is where the conversation usually stops and I retreat into my own head full of self loathing and defeat BUT I continued... "but you know, the scale doesn't define me. The scale doesn't speak of my self worth, it simply tells me how much I weigh. My worth is found in God". Wait, what? Did I just say that? Yes, I did and you know what else? I believed it when I said it!
Recently, I could tell that my emotions and thoughts were headed down a wrong path. I was allowing my insecurities get the best of me and make me anxious, nervous, and even angry. I was caught in a cycle of defeat, failure, feeling as though I never measured up, that I wasn't beautiful, that I wasn't worthy of love, and that I would never be able to fulfill anything God wanted for me. So, I decided it was time to detox my mind and my heart. My plan of action was simple but rather difficult; I took a complete break from social media for a few weeks, I stepped back from certain relationships that were not healthy, and I began to listen to books and scripture during my hour long commute to and from work. On my lunch break I began to listen to the same worship songs over and over again, ones that spoke to my heart about the faithfulness of God and I started taking control over every thought that was destructive.
The truth is that I have been trying and failing to lose weight for some time now (like a decade). My 30th birthday is approaching and it's coming at me like a neon sign that says "HERE I AM AND YOU HAVE NOT ACCOMPLISHED ANYTHING... YOU ARE STILL FAILING". But when I spoke those words out loud I realized that I finally understood that my pants size doesn't define me anymore. The moment I spoke those words I wanted to drop to my knees in worship because I realized that God had truly done a work in my heart and my mind. Those pounds were still there but I was NO LONGER DEFINED BY THEM. All the TRUTH that I had been putting into my head and my heart had finally come out of my mouth and what is even better is I BELIEVED THOSE WORDS!
My weight does not define me.
My childhood does not define me.
My relationships do not define me.
My job does not define me.
What others think of me does not define me.
God defines me... after all, HE created and uniquely designed me, He should have the sole right to tell me what I am. Here are just a few things that He tells me:
I am a daughter of the most high God.
In Him I am a new creation.
He calls me friend.
I am a workmanship of His created to do good works
The peace of God guards my heart and my mind.
I am loved
I am clothed with the righteousness of Jesus
This list could go on and on but you get the picture. This list is not just for me, you have a list as well; it is found in the pages of scripture where He is waiting to meet with you and tell you who you are.
He is changing my heart. He is reminding me of my worth. He is helping me find peace and joy in my every day life. He is changing my heart which is changing my words, which is changing my life.
What is your heart speaking?
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